"Lord, please prepare Jenna's heart for us and prepare our hearts for her. AMEN."
But how do you prepare your heart?
How do you prepare to welcome an orphan into your home and into your heart?
How do you prepare to love and nurture a child that has never experienced unconditional love and nurturing from a parent?
How do you prepare to deal with grief and loss in your child because she has been stripped of everything she has ever known in order to become part of your family?
How do you prepare your biological children for the changes that are about to take place in your family?
How do you prepare your heart to deal with questions that are bound to come when they see you with a child that doesn't look like you?
How do you prepare your heart to love a child that wasn't nurtured in your womb or born from your own flesh?
How do you prepare your heart to deal with questions from your child about why her birth parents abandoned her?
How do you prepare your heart to deal with the many unknowns about your child's history?
How do you prepare your heart to deal with people that think you're amazing since you're adopting?
How do you prepare your heart to face opposition from people that think it's crazy to adopt?
How do you prepare your heart?
There is no other answer to all these questions.
Jesus and Jesus alone.
He is the One that prepares your heart. It is not easy to explain how He does it, but He does.
Now I'll be the first to say that so many people have been used by the Lord to help prepare my heart. The wonderful, godly people at Lifeline Children's Services have been AMAZING throughout our journey. Families that have adopted or are in the process with us have been AWESOME. Friends and family members throughout the country and world have been WONDERFUL.
But as amazing, awesome, and wonderful as all of these people have been and will continue to be, it is only Jesus that can truly prepare my heart to become Jenna's mother. I am not able to be all that she needs me to be in my own power. I need His power to work in me and through me.
Lord Jesus, as I am just days away from holding Jenna for the first time, please continue to prepare both of our hearts for each other. I have longed for this time to come, but I confess I am scared and nervous, and I can only imagine how scared and nervous she will be. I need Your power, Your strength, Your wisdom and I pray for her little heart to be courageous and open to my love and Your love. AMEN.