Wednesday, February 1, 2017
Friday, January 20, 2017
Another first…but a tough first.
Friday, November 11, 2016
But today I am especially thankful that on this day three years ago we met our precious daughter in China.
That surpasses the time Jenna was without us…praise God!
However, all of the joy has not been without grief.
All of the love has not been without pain.
And all of the abundance has not been without brokenness.
Listening to Jenna ask questions about God and heaven and why Jesus died for us makes my heart smile but ushers in brokenness as I realize fresh and anew our desperate need for Him.
Adoption is a miracle…but miracles are often birthed out of grief, pain, and brokenness.
Thursday, November 12, 2015
“Of course I do…I will always love you, no matter what” I answered her, with tears in my own eyes as I swooped her up into my arms to hold her close.
These five words have come out of our precious girl’s mouth a lot lately…and each time she asks me this question, my heart aches as I share words that I hope will reassure her heart and mind.
It’s hard to believe that two years ago we met He Tong in China…a scared little girl that rarely smiled and had never experienced the love of a family.
But love alone is worth the fight...and here we are two years later.
Jenna knows she is loved and she adds so much joy to our family. Our sweet girl talks non-stop and is full of spunk, laughter, and life! Yet no matter how much love we pour into Jenna’s tender heart and soul, it breaks my heart that she sometimes questions our love.
I suppose we all do this from time to time…we wonder if others will love of us if we make a mistake or if we don’t perform the way we “should” or if we don’t look the way we think we “should” or if we…
Only the love of Christ can do this.
Just like I must continue to believe that God loves me no matter what...forever.
Sunday, August 30, 2015
one thing I’ve come to realize about Jenna’s skin condition...it is totally unpredictable.
Ichthyosis has stumped me.
For some reason, beyond my understanding, our little Jenna’s skin has not been looking good lately.
It has been extra dry and extra scaly.
And these scales are very visible…very.
Hence the stares.
They seem to never stop.
Most of the time, Jenna’s scaly skin doesn’t cause her any pain.
But stares from other people are bound to cause her pain.
As Jenna’s mom, my first reaction has often been to try to protect her from these stares. Although she doesn’t even know people are staring, there will come a day soon that Jenna will realize people stare at her…and I won’t always be there to protect her.
But today while we were at Six Flags having a blast together as a family, my perspective on this began to change.
While Jenna and I were in line for her favorite “Canyon Blaster” roller coaster, it was obvious that some people were staring at her. It was in that moment that I sensed a change in my heart about having to protect her from these stares.
People will stare, and I shouldn’t shield her from this.
Rather, I will love her through it and teach her to stand strong.
I have no explanation for why Jenna’s skin looks better one day and worse the next.
And I don’t owe any person that stares an explanation for her scales.
And I certainly have no good, reasonable, healthy, or sane explanation as to why our society is so darn obsessed with outward appearances.
So bring on the stares.
No longer do I feel the need to shield Jenna from these stares because her skin…her beautiful skin, scales and all…is simply part of who she is. And only a small part.
If there is one thing Jenna can help teach others it is that we are all so much more than our outward appearance.
So stand strong, sweet girl…you are beautiful—inside and out—in so many ways!