Preston Party of Six

Preston Party of Six

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Mother's Day 2013: My Conflicted Heart

This is the first year that I've struggled with looking forward to Mother's Day.  For as long as I can remember, Mother's Day was a time to celebrate my amazing mom.  And for the past 8+ years, I have been blessed with being a mom and Mother's Day has been a day to reflect on the blessing of both my children AND my mom.  But for the first time ever, this year I don't have my mom with me and my heart is aching.  And on top of that, for the first time ever, this year I don't have one of my children with me.  Jenna is on the opposite side of the world and my heart aches to have her here with me. 

As much as my heart is longing to be with my daughter in China and to see give my precious mom one more hug, I am reminded in Psalm 118:24 that "This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." I have so many blessings and reasons to rejoice in THIS day.  God has blessed me with an amazing husband who loves me with the love of Christ.  God has blessed me with three precious biological children that make me laugh and teach me more about the love of Jesus every day.  God has blessed us with the opportunity to welcome another child into our home.  God has blessed me with an amazing family that loves me unconditionally.  God has blessed me with awesome friends who love me and speak truth into my life.  And most of all, God has blessed me with the joy of His salvation! 

Mom, I miss you more than words can express.  As much as I rejoice in the fact that you are healed and whole in heaven, I long to give you one more hug, have one more conversation, and watch you play with my children.  I love you, miss you, and am so thankful for you!

Jenna, I cannot wait to have you in my arms.  As hard as it is to wait, I continue to trust that God is holding you in His arms and trust His perfect timing for when you will be with us. 

Lord Jesus, thank You for the many blessings in my life.  I am so thankful for the joys and challenges of motherhood.  Thank You for knowing my heart and that I can entrust my feelings, as raw as they are, to You.  No matter the language spoken, You are LOVE, and in You alone I can rejoice. AMEN.

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