Thursday, March 27, 2014
A Moment In Time
There are moments in life that you seem to never forget, when one moment in time can change the course of your life forever. Some of these moments in time are difficult and painful. Other moments are pure joy!
One of these moments in time was a year ago when I saw my daughter for the very first time. March 25, 2013 will always be the day that God changed my heart as a mom. Even though Jenna's face was on a computer screen because she was thousands of miles away in an orphanage in China, it was love at first sight.
I vividly remember being so nervous on March 25th last year because that was the day that the "shared list" was to be released. This is a list of precious children needing families that all adoption agencies that work in China have access to in order to try to match children with families waiting to adopt. I tried not to get my hopes up but as the day went by with no call from Andrea at Lifeline, our wonderful adoption agency, I have to admit I was sad. I was SOOOOO ready to see our daughter's face, to know who she was. But as the hours passed, it looked like it may be longer for that moment in time to happen...
Then at 10:07 PM, not only a call but also an e-mail came from Andrea. She called to say that she'd sent an e-mail with a file of a little girl that she wanted us to review.
I. WAS. SHAKING.
I remember praying, asking God, "Could this be our daughter?" even before we opened up the e-mail.
And as soon as I saw her picture, God answered my prayer.
"Yes, this is your daughter."
A moment in time that I was forever changed as a mom.
I had been so afraid to adopt, wondering if I would be able to love a child as much as the three that I had carried in my womb. And in that one moment, all fear was erased as I looked into the face of our Jenna Jean.
God, thank you for changing my heart and teaching me so much about you through a little girl that needed a family. I pray that I will be the mom she needs me to be and that she will know deep in her heart that she is wanted and loved by her family and mostly by you. AMEN.