The Amazing RACE

It's been a while since I've had time to sit down to write, but I couldn't miss the opportunity to share what's been on my heart since the 3rd Annual RACE for the Orphans took place almost a month ago. 

Leading up to RACE day on May 9th, I have to confess that I was nervous about several things...would the weather be good?  would we have enough volunteers?  will we have enough sponsorship money to cover our costs?  will we have a lot of runners and walkers so more money can go to the RACE grant fund?  And on and on and on my concerns went...

Thankfully I have an amazing husband who doesn't worry as much about things.  He kept reminding me that God is in this RACE and He will provide.

And you know what? 

That is EXACTLY what happened! 

In fact, God did more than just provide...He did what only He can do and provided more than I could've ever asked or imagined, just like He promises in Ephesians 3:20...

In my eyes, this truly was the amazing RACE...much better than the hit show on CBS!

God showed up BIG TIME!

• The weather was great.
• We had plenty of amazing volunteers.
• Corporate sponsorship more than doubled from last year's RACE, so all expenses were covered.
• This was by far the biggest RACE with more than 450 adults and children running and walking to show their support for children in need of forever families.

Due to this great turnout as well as overwhelming support from corporate sponsors and individuals, RACE for the Orphans was able to give $19,500 in grant money to the Williams and Jordan families. 

I was brought to tears several times on RACE day...

Watching our little Jenna run her heart out in the "Tot Trot" race was absolutely awesome. 

Seeing countless hands raised in the air when Jason asked at the start of the race, "If you've been adopted or have adopted a child, please raise your hand" was pure joy.

 

Seeing Wade and Brooke Williams hold their precious baby girl, Olive, who was once in need of a forever family, was priceless.

Watching Mark and Tiffany Jordan run and walk with their "Mia's Minions" Team in honor of their sweet daughter waiting for them in China was amazing.

Hearing John Waller share his family's inspirational adoption story through songs like "Crazy Faith" and "Orphan" was powerful. 

Watching hundreds of runners and walkers make their way around the Fairgrounds on a beautiful May morning when they could've been doing countless other things was absolutely B-E-A-UTIFUL!!!

God taught me several things from this year's RACE, though I admit I still need to work on not worrying about all the details so much.  But one thing I realized more than ever is this truth: when our passions and desires are aligned with God's passions and desires, He will be glorified! 

I absolutely love organizing and directing the RACE (alongside my amazing partner, Jason).  I love watching adoptive families get blessed by the outpouring of support from the community.  I love watching people run and walk to help bring children home to their forever families.  I love seeing people accomplish their goal of finishing their first 5K for such a worthy cause.  I love hearing people share how their hearts have become open to adopt a child and/or more aware of the needs of orphans around the world.  I love seeing God glorified in all of these ways.   

All of this love is from an overflow of my passion for the Lord, adoption, and running.

Our Heavenly Father is crazy in love with His children.  He chooses to adopt us into His family and runs with open arms to lavish His grace on us. 

Simply amazing!

   

I. AM. ADOPTED.

For the past 36 hours, I was blessed with the opportunity to attend my second Created for Care retreat for foster and adoptive moms. 

Two years ago I went for the first time, prior to even knowing who Jenna was, and I left there feeling inspired by 400+ other moms with the same heart for orphans. 

Last year I wasn't able to attend because we'd gotten home from China with Jenna just a few months earlier and she was still very afraid of her daddy, so leave her would've been traumatic for all of us. 

But this year, because of the Lord's miraculous work, I was able to go back with a new perspective on "this side of adoption" and left with another inspiring message in my heart.  Here's the message.

I. AM. ADOPTED.

This retreat was for ME.  Yes, we adopted a precious little girl that needed a forever family and she is so amazing.  But after all the worship, teaching, and fellowship this weekend, I left there knowing more than ever that I am also adopted by a loving, Heavenly Father that is continually, passionately pursuing my heart.

God writes great stories and His plans are beautiful, desiring us all to blossom into who He created us to be so that we can shout for joy and glorify Him.  Amidst all the heartache, pain, confusion and chaos that life can bring, God isn't finished yet and His promise to complete the work He started is true.  Our role is to grab onto His hand in total, utter dependence each and every step of the journey.  He is a good Father and He longs for us to follow hard after His heart and rest in His amazing grace.

Just as I want our children to know they are loved beyond measure, God wants me to know this, too.  The God of the universe has adopted me into His family and it's not based on what I do or don't do, but rather what Jesus did on the cross for me.  WOW!  This truth that is often hard for my heart to believe was impressed upon my heart fresh and anew this weekend. 

I. AM. ADOPTED.

E-X-C-I-T-E-D to be FOUR!

Every time I've given birth, I've been amazed by how much our children change during the first year of life.  From being completely helpless, needy infants to toddling, babbling one-year-olds, it is amazing to watch these changes take place in a matter of 365 days. 

I didn't give birth to Jenna and sadly missed out on the first 2 1/2 years of her life, but as I sit here reflecting on this year with Jenna, I'm simply amazed by all God is doing in her life. 

 

Last year when Jenna turned three, she didn't seem to know what was going on as we celebrated her life.  But this year, HOLY COW...the girl knows it's her birthday and is E-X-C-I-T-E-D about turning four!  It warms my heart to see her get so excited about having a party with preschool friends.  And what a special blessing it was when she watched me decorate her cake and quietly said, "Wow...thank you Momma!"  No joke...brought me to tears...happy tears.  It's as if she's finally realizing that she is truly loved, cherished, and celebrated.

Jenna is blossoming into a beautiful little girl, inside and out.  She loves to give people hugs and smiles all the time.  She is super silly and has a great laugh.  She's learning SO MUCH, she loves preschool, and her language has sky-rocketed...she talks non-stop!!!  Jenna is full of energy and loves playing with her big brothers and sister--jumping on the trampoline, playing UNO, coloring, and dressing up in princess costumes are a few of her favorite activities.  She prefers to have things in order and exerts her strong will when things are "out of sorts."  Jenna makes me laugh, she makes me cry, and she makes me all the more amazed by the beauty of adoption. 

I often look into Jenna's deep, dark eyes and wonder how I have been blessed to be her mom.

I often watch her sleep and cry tears of sorrow knowing that for 2 1/2 years of her life, she didn't have anyone to read book to her or say prayers with her at night.

I often hear her say, "I love you, Momma" and my heart rejoices in the fact that she knows she is loved, too.

I often watch her run into her daddy's arms and thank God for how she's grown to love and trust him.

I often listen to her laughing with her older brothers and sister and tears of joy fill my eyes.

I often touch her dry, scaly skin and thank God for the beautiful miracle that she truly is.

And I often think about Jenna's birthmother who is far away in China and will never have the joy of these experiences with her daughter.  To this woman I am forever thankful and pray she never gives up believing that her child is LOVED!

 

Jenna, it's been an absolutely amazing year watching you change and grow in so many ways.  You have brought so much joy to our family, and I hope you always know how much you are loved.  When I consider all that you've been through in four short years, I'm amazed by how brave, courageous, and strong you are.  It breaks my heart that there are millions of children around the world that are living in orphanages like you did for the first 2 1/2 years of your life.  I know one day I'll get to share your adoption story with you, and I pray that when that time comes, you will understand on an even deeper level how much you are loved by your family but most of all by your Heavenly Father.

Heavenly Father, thank you for the gift of our daughter Jenna.  Thank you for rescuing her four years ago when she was left by her courageous birthparents who wanted the best for their baby girl.  Thank you for the loving caregivers at the orphanage who cared for Jenna during the first 2 1/2 years of her life.  Thank you for allowing Jason and I to become her mommy and daddy.  Thank you for giving Jenna a sister and brothers that love her.  Thank you for the joy and laughter she brings to our family.  Thank you, Father, for how you are working in all of our lives to show us more of who you are and how you have adopted us into your family.  I pray Jenna will become a follower of you at an early age and glorify you with her life.  AMEN.  

Then and Now: One year HOME

One year ago tonight our family changed forever when a big plane from China touched down in Atlanta...we were finally the Preston Party of Six!

 

 

And exactly one year later...

Eating lunch at school with "Bubba"

Playing dolls with Andrew...such a good big bro!

Enjoying time with big sister Shelby

Skeeball anyone?

First taste of vitamin DC...a girl after my heart!

Jenna's FAVORITE bedtime book

only one word is sufficient: MIRACULOUS!

One Year Later: Six Flower Blooms

I've never really been into flowers.  Sure, I think they're pretty and some of them smell really good (when I take the time to smell them), but I've just never been that into flowers. 

Until now.   

Watching Jenna bloom like a beautiful flower throughout this past year has changed me into a "flower girl."

As I think back to one year ago today, when He Tong was placed into my arms for the very first time in a hot government building in Guangzhou, China, it's as if I was holding a tiny, fragile bud that was afraid to show her beauty to the world.

 

 

 

And today, one year later, it's amazing to see the difference a year makes.

 

 

Putting into words all the emotions filling my heart on this special one year anniversary isn't easy.  I've spent some time reflecting on our time in China and memories from this year.  I also continue to think about Jenna's birthparents and hope they somehow know their daughter is thriving.   

 

In this blog over the past year, I've tried to capture some of the highlights of our family and the newest flower added to our garden.  Yet as I reviewed what I'd already written, all of those words don't fully express the significance of today.

 

So when I recently came across this quote, it seemed to state in a few words what my heart is feeling.

 

 

When a gardener places bulbs into the ground, she has hope that they will grow and bloom into beautiful flowers.  While this requires work on her part, watering the bulbs and tending to the soil, God is the one that makes the flowers bloom. He is the giver of HOPE. 

 

And I've witnessed this fact over the past year in our family garden.

 

Jenna has bloomed into such a sweet, fragrant, beautiful flower.  There are times I look at her and I'm simply overcome with emotion--gratitude, joy, and praise, just to name a few.  She has conquered so many fears, experienced so many new things, and embraced each day with spunk, laughter, and joy.  As I've said before, I truly feel like I've been part of a miracle.

 

 

But Jenna isn't the only flower that has bloomed this year.  We are the Preston Party of Six, and there are five other flower blooms in this garden.

 

Andrew became a big brother for the first time one year ago.  In some ways I've noticed that this has rocked his world...he's no longer the baby of the family and that's a big change.  But my little bubbalicious has bloomed into a caring playmate for his younger sister and it brings a smile to my heart to see him embracing his new role with joy. 

 

Shelby fell in love with her new sister from day one in China, but she has continued to bloom into such a caring, generous, loving big sister.  I am blessed to have a younger sister who is also my best friend, and I pray that Shelby and Jenna will be like that throughout their lives. 

Nathan has blown me out of the water with his love for Jenna.  The "thinker" of the family, Nathan knew that adding another flower to our garden would create a lot of change...and he was right!  But one of the greatest of these changes has been in Nathan himself...he absolutely loves his little sis and she adores him. 

 



Jason has grown into his role as a father of four with grace, patience, and perseverance.  The first few months with Jenna were tough, there's no doubt about it.  She didn't like him and his heart was broken.  But over time, God worked in Jenna's little heart to trust her daddy more...and God worked on Jason's heart to trust his Father more.  The result?  A bloom that is only going to get more beautiful over the years.

I'm not going to be the one to judge the beauty or growth of my bloom in our family garden.  However, I will say that I continue to learn every day my utter dependence on the Lord and I am constantly amazed by His grace.  I don't deserve to have such a wonderful husband and four amazing children, but for some reason, He has granted me these blessings and I am so very thankful.

So as one of six flower blooms in our family flower garden,  all I know to say one year later is that God alone is the giver of hope.  This year has definitely had its share of ups-and-downs, but through it all, God has been faithful to shower hope upon our flower garden and for that I rejoice!

 

 

 

Staying Connected

Question:
What do our bodies, a cell phone, and a minivan all have in common? 

Answer:
They all need to stay connected to the right power source in order to work properly.

Our bodies require healthy food to grow, develop, and function properly.

Cell phones require a strong battery and a connection port that works properly in order to function correctly.

Minivans need a strong battery, alternator, gasoline and a slew of other things to work effectively.

Well, last week, it’s as if God slapped me across the face when all three of these things came to a screeching halt in my life.

One particular morning after a run, I felt really dizzy and realized I hadn’t eaten enough prior to my run.  My body was telling me that it needed good nutrition in order to work properly.

Then my cell phone quit working multiple times week because the connection port wasn’t functioning properly. Result?  No power source…the battery was completely dead.  It needed a totally new power source.

Finally, after working out at the gym one morning, I discovered that my minivan wouldn’t start.  Thankfully someone was able to use jumper cables to get the battery cranked so that I could get to an auto parts store where they assessed the battery.  Result?  Good battery…one of the kids must have left a light on or something.  But then a few hours later, while in carpool line at the kids’ school, the battery died again.  This time I started to panic because it got VERY hot, VERY quickly in the van and Jenna was starting to get VERY overheated.  I was able to pull over to the side of the road where someone with jumper cables tried to charge the battery again.  Result?  It worked…but only for a few seconds.   Thankfully we got a ride home and left my van to sit on the side of the road for about 18 hours until a tow-truck came to the rescue.  It was obvious that my minivan wasn’t connected to a strong power source, either. 

Then God spoke.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” ~John 15:5

A lightbulb the size of Texas went off in my brain. 

Apart from healthy food, my body cannot work properly.

Apart from a functioning connection port, my cell phone battery cannot work properly.

Apart from a functioning battery and alternator, my minivan cannot work properly.

Apart from Jesus, I. CAN. DO. NOTHING.

PERIOD.

This is one of those verses I’ve read a million times and although I believe it, for some reason last week it penetrated my heart even more.  It’s easy for me to “go through the motions” of life, not take time to “stop and smell the roses," or multi-task instead of looking my child in the eye.  I don’t like these things about myself and they are things I constantly battle. 

Yet last week I realized fresh and anew that I MUST stay connected to the One True Power Source in order to do anything…

Apart from Jesus, there is no purpose in life.

Apart from Jesus, there is no joy in life.

Apart from Jesus, there is no peace in life.

Does staying connected to Jesus make life easy?  ABSOLUTELY NOT!  In fact, Jesus promised His followers that they would experience problems (John 16:33b)…and dare I say that a dead cell phone and a dead car battery are very minor problems!  But then Jesus makes an even greater promise.  He says “But take heart!  I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33c). 

Staying connected to the One True Power Source may be simple but it’s not easy.  There is no formula to follow with three easy steps.  But being more intentional about what truly matters is certainly part of this process.  And disconnecting from some of the distractions of this world is also part of the solution.  Thankfully, God provides us with an example to follow and that is Jesus Christ.   In John 17:4, Jesus says to His Father, "I have brought you glory on earth by completing the work you gave me to do."

Unless I stay connected to Christ, there is no way I'll be able to say those same words at the end of my life. 

So yes, I’m  very thankful that God used a dizzy spell, a dead cell phone, and a dead minivan battery last week to get my attention and remind me once again how important it is to follow Him with all my heart, to stay connected to Him and fellow believers, and to produce “fruit” that matters for eternity.

The Beauty of Pain

“Pain demands to be felt.” ~The Fault in Our Stars

Has anyone else seen this movie?  It has its faults (no pun intended), but I absolutely loved it…even though I cried my eyes out almost the entire time.  It’s a real, raw, honest look at living with cancer, particularly teenagers dealing with this awful disease.  My first job as a nurse was working with people who were fighting cancer and I witnessed several die from the disease, including very young people.  And then I had the opportunity to be with my mom as she lived with, fought against, and ultimately died from cancer. 

But what keeps coming back to me from this movie is this particular line about pain.  Our society doesn’t like pain.  We do anything we can to escape it, alleviate it, or numb it.  But when the rubber meets the road, the truth is that pain really does demand to be felt.  Or put another way, in some way, shape or form, pain will be exposed.

We use all sorts of methods to try to escape, alleviate, or numb the pain that is inevitable in this life.  Drugs, alcohol, sex, food, exercise, materialism, or busyness are just a few things that come to my mind when I think about ways we try to keep pain from being felt.  We use these things so we don’t have to feel the pain, but through the use of these “coping mechanisms,” our pain is often exposed.  Drug addition, alcoholism, pornography, eating disorders, mounting debt, and running around like chickens with our heads cut off are all ways we “expose” the pain that we try so hard to not feel.

But where does this get us?

Deeper in pain.

So what’s the answer?

Allow pain to be felt…really felt.

In The Problem of Pain, C.S. Lewis wrote, “We can ignore even pleasure. But pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”

God used His megaphone in my life as I watched the woman who gave me life take her last breath.  While it was the most painful experience of my life, it was also one of the most sacred and special moments of my life.  There is no denying that I felt pain…deep pain in my heart.  But it was through this pain that God taught me this painful truth: pain brings beauty. 

My mom had a wonderful life but she also experienced a lot of pain in her 63 years.  However, by the end of her life, she was more beautiful than ever.  Physically she was emaciated from cancer eating away at her body, but her beauty resonated from something deeper…a profound peace and faith in God.  She, too, had learned that pain brings beauty.

“Pain demands to be felt” also made me think a lot about adoption.  Is it beautiful? YES!  Jenna has been home for 8 months now and it has been miraculous…truly beautiful.  But with every adoption is pain.  My precious daughter was at one point left on a busy street.  My precious daughter will never know the mother who gave her life and this courageous woman somewhere in China will never know how amazing her daughter is.  My precious daughter will one day ask difficult, painful questions about the first 2 ½ years of her life in China.  My precious daughter will be faced with difficult, painful questions about her genetic skin condition. 

I pray that God will give me the wisdom and courage to help Jenna feel her pain and then expose the beauty she has to offer this world.

Every child that was once an orphan and now has a loving, forever family is a picture of God’s grace and testimony to the fact that pain brings beauty.  Hopefully, God will “rouse a deaf world” by using Jenna and other children that were once orphans to show that He can create beauty from ashes and pain needs to be felt, not feared.

God doesn’t allow anything to be wasted, including our pain.  It is always for a greater purpose.  We may not fully understand that purpose this side of heaven, but there is a purpose.  Our job is to feel the pain and then expose the beauty that comes from it.

 

Just think how much more beautiful the world would be if we each exposed the beauty that comes from our pain?